Over at the community center, Micheál and Frances are discussing the “multimedia expert” who is coming by today to help the town prepare for the Ireland’s Villagiest Village contest. Of course Micheál does not think the town needs any multimedia, because he knows that if they get some, Réailtín will just use it to get herself Internet-kidnapped by her own brother again. Berni interrupts to try to make a pitch about how she loves everything about the approach they’re taking towards the contest, but just has one minor suggestion, which is to do the exact opposite. Her concept is that they re-paradigm the strategic visioning of the on-branding, i.e., make the entire campaign about how awesome the café is, and how people hardly ever find hair in their food there. Micheál does not have time for her nonsense and tells her to buzz off, and says tourists who come to town will just have to find out about the café the same way everyone else does, which is by eating there and then getting food poisoning. Just then a young woman arrives who turns out to be someone named Amy, whom I have never heard of, but who clearly annoys Berni, so I am in favor of her. Amy explains that she’s been off in Dublin earning a degree, and Berni rolls her eyes and acts snotty, and then Amy shuts her down by telling her she’d love to continue this conversation but can’t, because Berni is a bitch. It turns out Amy is the multimedia consultant, which really drives Berni around the bend, and I am liking this Amy person already.
Meanwhile, Dee and Mack’s Fighting World Tour 2017 continues, and the latest stop is the community center. Dee asks Mack if Gráinne was the one who told him about the baby, and he says no, it was Mo, because Gráinne isn’t telling anyone, duh. Dee confesses that she just put her foot in it, so Mack yells at her and then storms off again. Well, on the plus side, having Mack around hating her probably makes Dee miss Katy less.
At the B&B, Adam is complaining about how hung over he is from the previous night, while Fia, awesomely, is as bright as a shiny penny and showing no ill effects. Now we know which of these two can hold her liquor, or, more accurately, which of them has to hold back the other’s hair while he pukes in the alley behind the club. She puts the kettle on and tries to make conversation, but he’s not listening because he’s busy playing with his phone. It seems he met some guy at the club last night, an encounter he semi-remembers due to his hangover, and is now waiting for a response to the Fakebook message he just sent him. Fia tells him to forget about it, and that he can instead go to the crèche with her to pick up Liam Óg, but then he smiles when he gets a message back from his gentleman friend, and she looks dismayed. It seems she’s not as ready to see Adam with someone else as she thinks she is.
Back at the community center, Bobbi-Lee tells Dee that they had a little ceremony when Lee died, and it really helped her. Dee doesn’t think she should attend given the way she put her foot in it earlier, especially since she got the invitation from Mo, not Gráinne, and besides, she hasn’t gotten a text from Mack asking her to go. Bobbi-Lee’s opinion is basically that Dee needs to stop feeling sorry for herself, and also that Mack is an idiot. She’s all, “Come on, let’s go!”, and when Dee points out that Bobbi-Lee is not technically invited, Bobbi-Lee declares it seafóid, because she and David are extremely close. Yes, we remember when David woke up in her bed a few years ago and then decided they had to get married.
After the break, we are at the new shop, which looks exactly like the old shop, except with Briain in it. He’s on the phone with his mother telling her he needs her help getting his back pay from Australia or something. He really, really needs the money, man, like, right now, which doesn’t sound sketchy at all.
We return to Villagiest Village HQ, where Berni is trying to strong-arm Micheál into putting her menu on the new town website. I’m not sure why everyone in town has decided this contest is the chance they’ve been waiting for to find out what the Internet is. Micheál once again tells her to sling her hook, adding that the town has more important things to worry about than her stupid menu, like cleaning up the graffiti in the park and figuring out where all those zombies with swords are coming from. She eventually agrees to leave—FOR NOW—but not before giving him a copy of her new menu on a USB drive, which he looks at as if it’s come here from the future to destroy us all, or at least give us indigestion. She departs, and then Amy sidles over and says, “Come on, Micheál, you need the internet,” which we did not know still needed to be said in 2017, but then again, this is Micheál. He still listens to Tony Orlando and Dawn on his 8-track. She tells him if they put “this” on Facebook, hundreds of people will see it, and she lists everything the town has to offer, including the seashore, an Ghaeilge, the opportunity to be insulted by Tadhg, and the local radio station, which as she points out, we had all forgotten about because it doesn’t broadcast anymore. This last point intrigues Micheál, because it explains why he hears nothing but static coming from his sad kitchen radio now, even when it’s not switched on.
We end at Gráinne and David’s, where she’s getting dinner ready and he’s sat in his chair deep in thought. If you looked inside his head, you would see Dino the dinosaur running on a giant hamster wheel. Sensing that something’s wrong, mostly because he’s not talking incessantly, she leans around the world’s largest peppermill and says he’s been quiet ever since that conversation with Fr. Éamonn in which he kept miming small explosions in the vicinity of his crotch. He explains he was just thanking the father for his remarks, and she agrees that he was helpful, although the one who really made her feel better was Bobbi-Lee, who’s totally right that they have plenty of time to have lots more children together. Once again Bobbi-Lee saves the day! Oh, wait.